Lobster vasectomy and honoring the ultimate in sheer idiocy - The Darwin Awards
Sometimes I just have
to shake my head at what people are willing to do in the name of stupidity creative answers to burning desires. If you’re the same way, you’ll probably love The Darwin Awards - it contains such gems like:
Do it yourself, do yourself in:
Summer is the most blissful of seasons, when our favorite summertime activity — do it yourself stupidity — kicks into high gear. Meet Charles, 34, a Denver masonry contractor who created brick and mortar edifices. Charles was in construction. He had worked on houses, he had watched electricians install wiring. He believed this qualified him as a member of the Junior Electrician Society. He figured he could handle any electrical issue that came up around his own home.
One day on the job, Charles was apparently bonked in the head by his bricks. He had the great idea! He would build an electric fence in his own backyard. “An electric fence will keep the dogs in.” Charles connected a wire to an extension cord, and managed to encircle his backyard with a 120-V strand of wire without mishap. His dogs will not be sued for puppy support with this security system in place!
The household became accustomed to the fence, and things settled down to normal, until Charles picked up a passion for gardening. Charles had a real nice set of tomatoes, and I’m not referring to his wife. One day he reached for a tomato, put his hand on the electrified wire…..MORE….
Lobster Vasectomy
This tale proves that crime does pay, if you’re fishing for elective surgery to go along with your stolen goods.
A 24-year-old supermarket shoplifter stuffed a pair of live lobsters in his pants and sprinted for the door, but he never had a chance. The violated crustaceans brought the thief to his knees in front of startled cashiers when they fastened their powerful claws around his delicate parts.
Doctors were able to remove the animals with pliers. They say the thief will fully recover — except for one small detail. “It was a do-it-yourself vasectomy.” This man’s daring supermarket exploits make him one of the few Darwin Award winners to live to tell the tale.
The supermarket manager declined to press charges, saying the culprit has already “gone through enough pain (to) learn his lesson.” …MORE…
It takes all kinds in our happy world. 
ThankYouVeryMuch!
Owlbert
ps - you can actually buy some Darwin Awards:
The Darwin Awards 4 - 3 CDs - New - FREE SHIPPING!!!
The Darwin Awards II: Unnatural Selection, Wendy Northc
The Darwin Awards, DVD, David Arquette, Ty Burrell, Jos
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